The Oxford English Dictionary defines the word "douche-bag" as noun, U.S. slang, a general term of disparagement, esp. for an unattractive or boring person. However, this is perhaps the only time the entry in this most definitive record of the English language has ever been wrong. The negative colloquial usage now refers to an unseemly character, an arrogant cad of loose morals and questionable taste. But in recent months, the word has taken on a whole new meaning for a certain group of us. It is a most honourable title, synonymous with the greatest elitism, ostentatious (but substantiated) arrogance and the highest of achievement, reserved for the most baller of individuals, including myself and my good friend, Barney Stinson. While we recognise that there are certain fundamental incontravertible rights that everyone has and we hold the truth to be self evident that all men are created equal, we realise that some people are much more equal than others.
This blog hopes to update the devoted reader on the principles of Douche. From the correct usage of the word, to its etymological derivatives like the verb, to Douche, as well as both the theoretical and practical aspects of maintaining the lifestyle and a world of Douchemony, the articles posted here will educate and inform, and hopefully also entertain. Anecdotes of rap battles between Investment Bankers and Management Consultants, Ede and Ravenscroft gowns and Dom Perignon will be regaled, and this shall be the pre-eminent text in the field of Douching for the prospective baller. There are two types of people in this world that really matter: those that have it, and those that earn it. We, the people of Douchistan, as you will learn, are both.
